Thursday, September 4, 2014

Al Qaeda Re-enters the Fray

Now that the success of ISIS has consigned Al Qaeda to the B Team of global jihad, the formerly pre-eminent terrorist movement is fighting back. Al Qaeda's non-charismatic non-caliph (the stud with the prayer wound on his forehead) has announced that his mirthless band of holy warriors has set its sights on a new (which is to say a very old) piece of land: India.

Will this catapult AQ back into the front ranks--and the headlines? That remains to be seen, of course.

Update: "I'm the caliph." "No, you're not. I'm the caliph." Whereupon both break out into song:

Caliph A:
Anything you can rule, I can rule better.
I can rule everything better than you.

Caliph B:
No you can't.

Caliph A:
Yes, I can.

Caliph B:
No you can't.

Caliph A:
Yes, I can.

Caliph B:
No you can't.
No you can't.
No you can't.
Anyone you can kill, I can kill faster.
I can kill anyone faster than you.

Caliph A:
No you can't

Caliph B:
Yes, I can.

Caliph A:
No you can't.

Caliph B:
Yes I can.

Caliph A:
No you can't.

Caliph B:
Yes, I can.
Yes, I can.
Yes, I can...

Update: It'll be an uphill battle for Al Qaeda to wrest back the "cool" cred from ISIS.

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